“Do you have change for a twenty?” – Why wallets are better than purses.

When considering the accessories that your man should have, the most vital tool that a man should come equipped with is his wallet.  The wallet is an interesting component. The wallet can come in several different styles for different age groups and social classes. The wallet can be chained to the owner’s belt loop or assigned a different location on the owner’s person depending on the style of dress he is in.  The wallet has several folds and pockets to store identification, business cars, photos, a single condom and of course cash. 

So what is the big deal about a wallet?

The wallet is a symbol for a man’s identity in a relationship.  The wallet represents man’s pride.  A man who leaves his wallet at home becomes vulnerable and lost as if he were a child sent out on walk-about in the Australian Outback.   

As men we feel that our marital responsibility is to provide for our spouse.  Men WANT to pay for things.  No matter how much we bitch and complain about it, men do not want to give up their right to pay for things.  When we are with our spouses and we are buying something together, 9 times out of 10 the man is pulling his wallet out of his back pocket and ready to fork over the cash or the plastic.  Women KNOW this and EXPECT it.  If women pull out money to pay for anything it’s because they are unsupervised by their male counter parts.  This does not mean that men are superior to women and that women should not ever have money or be able to use it. Men need to fulfill their role as the provider. To deny a man his natural role will negatively chip away at his psyche.  This is strictly a reinforcement of the male ego. The only time we as men should ever ask for money from the wife is if it comes in the form of quarters, dimes, nickels or pennies. Loose change and the need for unneeded accessories is the purpose of a purse.  Men do not carry a purse because they are efficient and prioritize.  If a woman tries to attack a man’s need to pay this could be dangerous to the male ego! If the male ego suffers damage it could be irreversible.

Socially, men want to display their capability of providing for themselves and establishing their place in the social hierarchy.  The wallet is an extension of our personalities and our accomplishments. If we are with a group of friends, we do not want to look incompetent amongst one another.  The wallet is the symbol of our providing skills and can not be stained with the embarrassment of moth infestation or several declined credit cards.

How do I keep my man’s ego intact?

To sustain efficient wallet maintenance, men should always keep plenty of singles and twenties in their wallets and at least two credit cards and one debit card.  This combination will allow any man to provide a division of large bills or handle hearty purchases on the fly and avoid any embarrassment.  Singles are primarily for vending machine purchases and girth of the wallet; the fatter the wallet the bigger the ego.

Keep some pictures in your wallet. Photos of the wife/girlfriend or both (if you’re that guy, which is pretty ballsy if you ask me) will remind you why your wallet is in your back pocket in the first place.

Space is limited. It’s not necessary to keep anything in your wallet that doesn’t belong. The best way to do this is to go through your wallet at least once a month and eliminate any paper waste, i.e. recepits or business cards.

For the single guy or the swinger, condoms take up a good portion of space. If you need it keep it but rotate the old with the new.  You don’t need any accidents happening that could force you into a n unwanted predicament (children and wives make the wallet slimmer).

Wallets can be substituted for money clips for only two reasons: tight pants or little pocket space.

There is no reason a man should be wearing tight pants, so that narrows it down to the latter.  Limited pocket space is due to wearing a suit or similar fancy dress. The style of the money clip is essential to the outfit of the wearer.  If the money clip style is abused however, it can be deemed uncool and foolish looking. So use the clip sparingly and take pride in your wallet.

The wallet is a part of you but like most things that are old and grungy it doesn’t last forever.

So when should I replace my wallet?

The timeframe is different for us all. When you know, you know. The wallet tells a story of its owner so the longer you have it the stronger the history. If history is not important to you, remember to maintain your wallet’s upkeep and replace if necessary. A variety of wallets will only lead to lost cards or money! One wallet is enough.  Another place to store money is your bank account not another wallet.  This is why bank accounts exist.

So remember, the wallet is an extension of your skills as a provider and reinforces your male ego.  Maintaining your wallet is just as important as maintaining your life.  Women should encourage this aspect of the male ego so that their man is secure and can act out his role as a provider.  The most important thing to a man is his family and his ego. Damage either of these and he is now a broken man.